I don’t know who has shed more tears these first four weeks: Lucy, Sam or… me.

I was warned that I may feel a little emotional for a couple of weeks after giving birth. A couple of weeks? Hopefully its normal to double that timeline when you have twins, because my tear ducts are showing no signs of slowing down anytime soon.

Amazingly, only two of my crying sessions have been actual melt downs. The first one was in the hospital when both Lucy and Sam were crying and I couldn’t calm either of them down, which made me feel like a total failure. The second one was at home, in the middle of the night. Lucy was screaming and I couldn’t get a onesie over her head, which made me feel like a total failure. (Parental guilt is amazing, and manifests instantaneously when children are born.)

But every other time, its been tears of joy (as corny as that sounds). Tears of joy when Lucy Emma and Samuel John were placed in my arms for the first time. Tears of joy as I introduced them to our families. Tears of joy as I stare at them sleeping in their crib every day. Tears of joy as I watch Mark rock them to sleep. Tears of joy as I watch the little smiles on their faces (even if it is just gas!).

Tears of joy… I don’t think they’ll be letting up anytime soon. And I’m okay with that.