Alright. Why don’t more women talk about this? Why don’t doctors warn you about it? Do they think that new moms will be so distracted by the new bundle(s) of joy in our arms that we won’t notice that we still look six months pregnant?!?!

Yes, I’m talking about the “Bowl Full of Jelly” uterus. I’m not an idiot. I didn’t expect to walk out of the hospital at my pre-pregnancy weight, but I also didn’t expect to leave sporting a Santa Claus gut. My stomach now moves and jiggles like a bowl full of jelly. Throw me in a red suit and you wouldn’t be able to tell me apart from dear old Saint Nick.

Everyone assures me that it will go away. It will just take some time for my uterus to shrink down to its pre-pregnancy size. Apparently it grew more than 1000 times its original size to house the twins.

And now the twins are out, but the belly remains. Getting dressed is a bit of a challenge (on the days I manage to get dressed). My pre-pregnancy clothes aren’t even close to fitting, and who wants to wear maternity clothes when you’re not pregnant anymore?? Especially when all my maternity shirts are tight… I was proud of my baby bump. I liked showing it off. Showing off the “bowl full of jelly” uterus? Not quite as cute.

So for now I’ll just have to make peace with my jiggly belly, while I wait for it to shrink. But if anyone asks me to “ho ho ho”… I can’t guarantee you’ll make it out alive.

And no, there will be no pictures attached to this blog post.