I was at the local Cold Beer & Wine store the other day. Normally I go straight for the beer. I like beer. I like fruity beer, hazy beer, pale ales, loggers… lots of kinds of beer. 

But on my way to the cooler, I got distracted by the ciders, coolers and hard seltzers. Hmmmmm… maybe I should try something different, I thought. And then I saw a package that looked familiar. It was a 6-pack of gin cocktails. Normally I’m not a huge gin fan, but a friend had given me one of these a couple weeks ago at a picnic in a park and it was quite refreshing. 

Proud of myself for stepping out of my comfort zone and trying something new, I paid for my gin cocktails and went home. 

Later that evening I cracked one and took a sip. 

You guys… I don’t like gin. 

I don’t know why I liked it that day at the park with my friends. Maybe it was because it was sunny, and I was hanging with some great people and I didn’t have a care in the world. Maybe it was because it felt good to expose my pallet to a different array of flavours. Maybe it was because the gin complimented the Greek takeout and honey cruller donuts we were eating.

But now… drinking it at home, in my living room… I don’t like it. I made a bad decision. I brought the wrong drink home. 

And therein lies one of my biggest fears… 

As you all know, I’m in a major (not self-imposed) transition in my life: I need a new job. I would love to stay in radio; I know it, I’m passionate about it and I’m gooooooood at it. But there aren’t a lot of radio jobs in Vancouver so I’m trying to broaden my horizons. I’m looking at other industries and other jobs and other ideas and other options… 

But, you guys… WHAT IF I BRING THE WRONG CAREER HOME?

What if I think I like something but it’s just BECAUSE IT WENT WELL WITH HONEY CRULLER DONUTS???

I’m so easily influenced. True story, after I watched ‘Top Gun’ in high school, I sent away for information on flight schools. After I watched ‘Up Close and Personal’ I signed up for the Broadcast Journalism Program at BCIT. I have to be very cautious about what I watch over the coming months. My friend Jen doesn’t want me to watch Jurassic World Domination until I somewhat figure out my life. 

(How long does it take to get a Ph. D. in palaeontology?)

But seriously… what if I think I want to be a nurse and I take the classes and write the exams and then remember that I didn’t want to be a nurse at the Blood Donor Clinic, I just wanted the cookies they gave us afterwards?!??!?

(Note to self: lay off the donuts and cookies for awhile. It’s clouding your focus.)

In all seriousness, I’m not 20. Hell, I’m not even 30. (And we’ll stop there.) I don’t have the luxury of trying to ‘find myself.’ I have a mortgage and a few kids. (Does a few mean three? I bet a Doctor of Palaeontology knows that.) I kinda need to figure out my life… sooner rather than later. 

So… I’ll continue to work on that. (PS any tips or ideas are VERY welcome!)

And in the meantime I’m going to crack a gin cocktail, because that’s what I have in my fridge. 

I wonder if we have any donuts…

(And no disrespect to the beverage I bought. The flavours are lovely… for people who like gin.)