I was at the local Cold Beer & Wine store the other day. Normally I go straight for the beer. I like beer. I like fruity beer, hazy beer, pale ales, loggersโ€ฆ lots of kinds of beer.ย 

But on my way to the cooler, I got distracted by the ciders, coolers and hard seltzers. Hmmmmmโ€ฆ maybe I should try something different, I thought. And then I saw a package that looked familiar. It was a 6-pack of gin cocktails. Normally Iโ€™m not a huge gin fan, but a friend had given me one of these a couple weeks ago at a picnic in a park and it was quite refreshing.ย 

Proud of myself for stepping out of my comfort zone and trying something new, I paid for my gin cocktails and went home.ย 

Later that evening I cracked one and took a sip.ย 

You guysโ€ฆ I donโ€™t like gin.ย 

I donโ€™t know why I liked it that day at the park with my friends. Maybe it was because it was sunny, and I was hanging with some great people and I didnโ€™t have a care in the world. Maybe it was because it felt good to expose my pallet to a different array of flavours. Maybe it was because the gin complimented the Greek takeout and honey cruller donuts we were eating.

But nowโ€ฆ drinking it at home, in my living roomโ€ฆ I donโ€™t like it. I made a bad decision. I brought the wrong drink home.ย 

And therein lies one of my biggest fearsโ€ฆย 

As you all know, Iโ€™m in a major (not self-imposed) transition in my life: I need a new job. I would love to stay in radio; I know it, Iโ€™m passionate about it and Iโ€™m gooooooood at it. But there arenโ€™t a lot of radio jobs in Vancouver so Iโ€™m trying to broaden my horizons. Iโ€™m looking at other industries and other jobs and other ideas and other optionsโ€ฆย 

But, you guysโ€ฆ WHAT IF I BRING THE WRONG CAREER HOME?

What if I think I like something but itโ€™s just BECAUSE IT WENT WELL WITH HONEY CRULLER DONUTS???

Iโ€™m so easily influenced. True story, after I watched โ€˜Top Gunโ€™ in high school, I sent away for information on flight schools. After I watched โ€˜Up Close and Personalโ€™ I signed up for the Broadcast Journalism Program at BCIT. I have to be very cautious about what I watch over the coming months. My friend Jen doesnโ€™t want me to watch Jurassic World Domination until I somewhat figure out my life.ย 

(How long does it take to get a Ph. D. in palaeontology?)

But seriouslyโ€ฆ what if I think I want to be a nurse and I take the classes and write the exams and then remember that I didnโ€™t want to be a nurse at the Blood Donor Clinic, I just wanted the cookies they gave us afterwards?!??!?

(Note to self: lay off the donuts and cookies for awhile. Itโ€™s clouding your focus.)

In all seriousness, Iโ€™m not 20. Hell, Iโ€™m not even 30. (And weโ€™ll stop there.) I donโ€™t have the luxury of trying to โ€˜find myself.โ€™ I have a mortgage and a few kids. (Does a few mean three? I bet a Doctor of Palaeontology knows that.) I kinda need to figure out my lifeโ€ฆ sooner rather than later.ย 

So… Iโ€™ll continue to work on that. (PS any tips or ideas are VERY welcome!)

And in the meantime Iโ€™m going to crack a gin cocktail, because thatโ€™s what I have in my fridge.ย 

I wonder if we have any donutsโ€ฆ

(And no disrespect to the beverage I bought. The flavours are lovelyโ€ฆ for people who like gin.)